Shocked. Seriously.

It's not my style to post the everyday stuff I see or hear in my life, but this was really shocking. Probably to some of you, it's something normal (I'm not going into a long post about culture, communication and more) but in Malaysia, especially in a teacher's training college, I did not expect such language to be used in public, and what's even worse - it's not just spoken, but shouted at someone else.

The first thing to remember is that being a senior does not automatically grant you the right to do anything you like. In fact, the more senior you are, the more matured you should be, and I assume that being so old, one would know that it is extremely rude and inappropriate to call another person a bitch, especially when she has done nothing wrong.

The story goes like this: (M is the nickname of the senior)
At the block 4 common room, three groups of people were having their discussions. Two came from the PPISMP TESL group who were probably talking about their choral speaking and activities during their English Camp, which will be held next week. For my group, I was involved in the story telling during English week, which will be held the week after. Of course, having so many people in a small, closed space, we could hardly hear ourselves talking. Still, it's possible to move closer to each other in order to hear them speak.

Suddenly, in the midst of chastising us for being late (yeah, it's our fault for being late, but that's not the main point), M suddenly yelled 'Can all of you SHUT UP and do your discussion quietly?' Someone from the choral speaking group spoke up, albeit less loudly, 'You shut up too.'

Then M lost control and started shouting, 'You SHUT UP, BITCH!' That was the most shocking part of the whole incident. I mean, if you want to argue, fine, but if you start to degrade other people by calling names, you are just showing how low you are. I guess the rest of the juniors were just as equally surprised, as they kept quiet and whispered among them after that.

M then continued, 'I'm very angry now...so you all better keep quiet, blah blah' (the rest of my memory is blurred). And then I start to wonder.

1. The common room is a place for everyone to use, and unless you have officially booked it, everyone should be allowed to make noise or do whatever in it.

2. If you really require somewhere more conducive for a meeting, the logical thing to do would be for the smallest group to move somewhere else (we were the smallest group there) since it would be easier for us to find a place.

3. The junior was not wrong to ask you to shut up, since you started the rudeness, and she just gave an eye for an eye.

4. (As posted in my FB) 'bitch' not only means a woman who behaves in a very unpleasant way, but it also means 'female dog'. In this case, I think M fulfilled the criteria better, judging by the way she acted.

5. What's the point of the sentence 'I'm very angry...' Should other people even care that you are angry when you behave this way? And I place this statement under childishness, if one thinks that other people should comply with them just because they are angry. Besides, being angry does not give you the right to let someone else be the brunt of your anger.

6. It wouldn't have sounded so harsh if you spoke to her in a common tone. Did you really have to shout something so rude? I wouldn't have qualms using these words in a joking tone too.

Probably the words 'shut up' and 'bitch' are very commonly used overseas, and this M picked up the habit of using them. However, to cite a Malay idiom 'masuk kandang lembu menglembu, masuk kandang kambing mengembek' (it means one should learn to adapt to the culture wherever they go). If you want to behave so outspokenly and straightforward in a culture that accepts it, fine. But once you come back to Malaysia, it would do you well to remember 'budi bahasa budaya kita', that we want to encourage and nurture good manners and etiquette among the people we are teaching. No use being a hypocrite, acting all cute and good in front of the children; and throwing it all to the wind behind them.

And here, we are not talking about a positive culture such as a foreign accent, cleanliness, free thinking and stuff, we are talking about something offensive, which would be considered rude in a Malaysian context. Even on internet forums where nobody actually sees or hears you, I've been trained not to 'talk' that way. If that is what one brings back from overseas, then what is the point of going overseas?

I've ranted too much in this post. I just hope that this post will be a reminder for me to stay true to my roots and remember how to absorb good values and stay away from bad ones, since I will be going overseas in a few months time.

Till then, adios!

P.S: This post is not meant to be offensive to any party. I'm just recounting the events that happened and stating my point of view on them.

^_^